The Heart Of The Beast----Page 21

The innocence of a child contemplating joy.
The perfection of the night air. Unbelievably
billowing white clouds against a crystal blue sky
during the day. The world was a small place
even as I stood on the ledge. Even as the
sand blinded me. Red was fun, but misunderstood,
so I explained it away. One day the thorns
dug too deep and it was not seen as an accident.
It was seen as retribution. It was seen as an
eye for an eye.
From whence did I come? I did not know,
but I knew that this was temporary. But it
could not be cut short. That would impact others.
I was here for them. But it was not always
pretty or easy. I remember sweetness being
denied. And the stoic resolve. One could do
without most of the temptations of life. To
give in to the temptations could mean to be
ruled by them. When would I be ready to move
on? And when would they be ready? No one could
say the hour.
The years went by; marked by success and
failure, but mostly success. Sometimes success was
a curse. Sometimes responsibility floundered like
a train racing off the tracks. Eventually there
was a new level of freedom. But even that was
a double edged sword. Enjoyed at the expense
of time and energy. Moving on was not always
easy; sometimes it could take years. But they
were not lost years. I put them to good use.
As all activity is worth the effort for the
mere lessons learned.