The Heart Of The Beast----Page 16

Sometimes there is something headed out
of control. We try to force things to be
where we want them, but things have their
own way. We are slaves to the currents in
our lives. We must get into the flow that
only we can know to move into the light
of our destiny. Sometimes it is like a blind
man feeling his way.
The anger gave way to love and a
precarious balance of contentment. With that
realization I no longer felt like a vagabond
who had lost all reference points. But I was
still a vagabond. The wind of years of
wandering relentlessly pressing against my body.
I had a new platform to leap from...like
a cat cornered on a ledge who suddenly
remembers he has legs. Like a gambler of
steady nerves pulling the wild card from the
deck. I do not know if there is a God in
heaven, but I had an answer that was made
especially for me.
Wiping the sweat off of my face I
knew that there was far to travel. But
I was not afraid. Because I had been
to the center of the darkest city. And I
had seen the rising of my own personal
phoenix. The ashes were the bittersweet
memories of yesterday. I had a new and
intoxicating desire to construct tomorrow. It
seemed as if I had no choice but to go
on. Following the path that was forged in
the past.